It’s important to have plans, but even more important is to be flexible and not hold so fast to those plans that you feel ruined if they fall through.
I traveled for work this week and was in the Catskills Mountains of New York for almost five days. Based on the agreed-upon schedule, I knew I would have plenty of time to go on a few runs and perhaps even get a nice meal once or twice. After being sick last week, I was feeling better but still had a cough, which was nothing I couldn’t deal with.
I didn’t know that the schedule would change and that just about everything I assumed based on discovery calls with this client was missing information. That led to long days. I also had 45 minutes of travel between the site and my room. That only left the early morning for workouts, but it was cold and dark outside. I also ended up only having one rushed meal each day. The days were long.
Stuff like this used to ruin the rest of my experience, but I have a lot more bandwidth for unmet expectations than I used to, and I’m thankful for that. I’m grateful that the alternative is not lowering my expectations but simply being ok with how things end up going.
On this trip, I had the opportunity to work with guys with very different religious beliefs from my own. They were some of the nicest and most accommodating people I have ever met. In between the stress of getting everything set up with deadlines approaching, we had great conversations about life, family, and the quality of life choices we have made over the years.
Insight About Past Experience & Connection
I’ve had a lot happen in life and spent years feeling shame and disappointment. I knew that my past experiences would be used in the lives of others at some point. I knew that would require sharing it and being more open. I don’t have a problem with it, but it makes me uncomfortable. I tried to win battles on my own, but that rarely worked. I struggled through those things never finding anyone to commiserate with in my struggling. It was a solo battle that, at the time, was unique enough that nobody I opened up to could relate to. Now, I realize that enduring these things alone built my resilience. I wouldn’t understand as deeply as I do now if it hadn’t gone that way. That is because I always looked for the easy way out. I didn’t have grit.
We live in a time where we are intolerant of anyone with opinions different from ours, but we will make a large purchase decision based on a three-sentence review from a stranger on Google. We don’t like to be told how to think, what to do, or how to do it, but we seek this kind of information from total strangers on the internet. We’ve never been more connected but with less personal connections.
These are things I’m thinking about and have a desire to push back against.
Weekly Debrief
Fitness:
- Cycling: 26.5 Miles
- Running: 0 Miles
Biggest Insight:
- I’ve realized that my life journey of learning through personal experience, often difficult and unnoticed, has build within me grit and endurance, has given me deeper insights, resilience, and emotional intelligence that now allows me to learn from others and apply it to my life.
Wins
- Work trip to NY went great. Was able to use my camera and tech experience to set up a well designed system for live streaming.
- Deep personal insights about my past struggles and current successes.
- Good conversations with others who have vast differences in their religious beliefs.
- Great workout after 12 days of illness.
- Using my past to build connections with others.
- Driving through the Catskills Mountains during autumn.
Losses
- Was sick most of the week
- Didn’t get to run while in NY
- Didn’t journal much
This Week:
- Catch up on client work
- Follow up with NY client
- Cohen’s first basketball games of the season
- Men’s event at church
- Winterize travel trailer
Think more about:
- My story
- Writing, podcasting, video
Quotes from books I read this week:
- Clear Thinking – Shane Parrish
- “Our first step in improving our outcomes is to train ourselves to identify the moments when judgement is called for in the first place, and pause to create space to think clearly.”
- “Time is the friend of someone who is properly positioned and the enemy of someone poorly positioned.”
- The Art of Being Alone – Renuka Gavrani
- “You’ll stop worrying what others think about you when you realize how seldom they do.”
- “Being alone doesn’t mean you are lonely. Being alone means you are with yourself.”
- Don’t Believe Everything You Think – Joseph Nguyen
- “The truth is not something you think, but something that you know and feel deep in your soul.”
- “Your mind is the greatest salesman and knows exactly what to say to life you back into its vicious cycle of destructive thinking.”
A friend of mine is going through some stuff so I have been searching highlights from past books I have read for insights that can help and encourage him. A while back I started saving highlights to Notion and created a widget to display random quotes on the home screen of my phone.
It’s easy to not only forget what we’re read in the past but more importantly not have a plan to integrate it into our lives. Most books start with lofty promises but they often fail to provide us a plan for making those promises a reality. It’s important to take notes, to highlight items, to distill the body of information into actionable steps.
Had a nice end of the week with family around a warm fire.
I pray you have a fulfilling and productive week!
Blessings,
Jerad
